This morning is a little more squirrely. My thoughts run about -chattering away- all hard to keep up with, catch, and collect. There’s some worry, scampering off in one direction with hope running behind trying to keep up. My thoughts travel in circles like I’m chasing my own tail, and I’m not sure -at all- what to do about any of it.
Uncertainty is itchy and uncomfortable and I don’t like it.
I’d been expecting some kind of hallelujah chorus of summer and instead of singing, I feel like I’m searching – a little blindly – hands outstretched and feeling my way around.
Maybe this is what growth feels like.
Maybe this is like those mornings when your clothes suddenly feel too tight, or the tag’s a little irritating, and it’s time to change. Summer’s children shoot up like fireworks, exploding in growth spurts … so maybe this is mine.
Maybe there’s some unconscious thought trying to work its way to the surface and I need to be patient in anticipation of its arrival and the learning it will offer.
Life plateaus and rises, dips and climbs, and then rests some more. Maybe all this out of sorts is just a little bit of post-plateau crankies. A hour or day or two from now these thought circles of mine will straighten and I’ll feel taller somehow, more capable, and ready for the next curving rise of the road.